My Weekly Recap #realtalk

Hi y’all!

If you’ve been following me in my FB group, Bottleneck Busters, you’ve been seeing some crazy real talk videos of what’s happening with my new store.  I give lots of advice, prayers & eye opening legit truth about the business experience.  So, here’s a little of what’s been going on & how the Lord truly showed up and helped me deal.  If you’d like to hear more of what’s going on and get some help with navigating your business or future business, be sure to join the group!  Enjoy!

Ignore the Distractions & Keep Pressing!!!

My daughter’s been threatened with suspension from her bus. What did she do? Not sitting in her assigned seat. Why? Another child is sitting in her seat, so she has to sit elsewhere. Has she tried to handle it? Yes. She talked to the boy 3 times and he’s refused to move. Has she told the bus driver? Yes. The bus driver’s response? “I can’t do anything about him.  But if you do it again, you’ll be suspended from the bus.”

MAMA BEAR RANT:

REALLY?? You can’t tell a child to move or they’ll get suspended, but you can tell my child the exact same thing??? Lady…I’m gonna need you to get your life.  You drive elementary, middle school AND high school kids around, but you can’t tell the smallest child on the

Rant over (I’m thinking more, but no point in putting it out there. Serves no positive purpose).

So, my husband will talk to the little boy’s parents. They live around the corner. He’s probably gonna get in significant trouble. That’s not the point, though.

I want to deal with the fact that this driver is rude, leaves kids, leaves kids even when she sees them running to the bus, drives over the yellow line and in the dirt (almost ditch) and is just not professional about her job.

Yeah, I could deal with the child directly, I could deal with the parents. However, that wouldn’t change the behavior of this driver who is endangering children and may need to make a career change for the safety & happiness of all parties involved.

I want the prize. I want the overall issue fixed. Not to mention…

THIS IS A DISTRACTION! I have other, much more important things to deal with! Not saying that my daughter’s health & happiness are not important (I’ll drive her daily if I have to. It’s like 4 minutes, literally!) But I know that last week I sat down and the Lord gave me a weekly schedule to keep. And what’s been popping up all week? Distractions.

This is my advice to you today:

Be sure to understand the difference between important, urgent, necessary, crucial & minor. Checking your goals daily will help you differentiate these categories. Be sure to give them the amount of time that correlates to their weight and you’ll see more and more progress toward your goals.

I hope this was an eye opening post. Now let me go make a phone call. I took care of this goal for the day, so now I have time to go deal with Ms. Bus Driver…I may let y’all know the update (if you think it would be post worthy).

Until next time!

Tonya

Happy New Year!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

happy-new-year

Hey guys!  I’m back from vacation and I’m raring to go for 2017.  I have lots of fun stuff and surprises planned.  Not only for your kids, but for us as moms, for authors  and for entrepreneurs.  I’m SOOOO excited you are coming on this crazy fun journey with me this year!  Look forward to many new adventures and new ways to not kill your kids before they turn 18!

40 & Molested: My David’s Bridal Experience

If I wasn’t going for a friend. If it wasn’t her big day. Lord, if her momma wasn’t there. I would have went off. What am I talking about? Me, a 40 year old grown %%% woman got molested while shopping for a Matron of Honor dress at David’s Bridal! I’m not crazy, she really went too far. *Full disclosure-this post is not up to my usual standards. I was really upset about this situation, so please forgive me if it’s a bit raw. But I just wanted to warn you about some people. Not everyone is this disrespectful, but if someone tries to get in your bubble of personal space or permittable distance, be ready.

Let me give the back story. A friend of 10+ years asked me to be her Matron of Honor. So sweet and unexpected! So when people ask me to do things like that, I want no attention drawn to myself. I’d gone with her to get her bridal gown at this David’s Bridal location and that was a breeze, so I really (stupidly) expected the same level of professionalism and ease this time. Boy, was I mistaken…

Let me get right to it. I needed a dress with straps. Those who know me and have seen me live & in color know I’m busty. You also know that me saying I’m busty is a huge, laughable understatement. Yeah, I got enough for all y’all. I’ve had countless requests to donate “just a little bit” of mine followed by the comment that I wouldn’t even miss it.  So with all this I’m carrying, strapless wasn’t gonna happen. No, I’m not jiggling and jangling down the aisle for anyone (well, for my hubby of course, but this wasn’t the time or place for that!)

This girl (the sales lady) kept bringing me:

Halter dresses (the kind that close behind the neck and give instant side boob-Oh. GOD. No.)

Empire cut (the kind that tells your boobs where they should start and stop. No, these girls are not the boobs for that! They go where they wanna, when they wanna. You do the accommodating.  You fit them, not fit into something for you, thank you!),

Sheer top (I’m about to get a little vinegary at this point. Lady, did you not hear me say “Only bring dresses with straps”?? Obviously it’s to cover my bra that I currently was wearing that I plan to wear in the ceremony!  So no, sheer top with my bra straps showing would not be classy, but trashy!)

And any other dress she could find that didn’t fit the bill. At this point, I’m not thinking good things about her. Honestly, I’m thinking she’s a dip. That’s not nice, but that’s how I was feeling.

At this point I figure she’s not listening to me and the bride has 2 other appointments to get to in about an hour, so I just go browse by myself. I found one I liked that was the right color, length & was classy, but I wasn’t sure it would cover everything. I had tried 3 sizes of the dress and found one that was almost perfect. I’d slipped on the best fitting dress, stepped out to get the bride’s opinion and stated to the assistant that I needed a size larger to see if it would have more coverage up top (I demonstrated by gesturing with my hands on my chest where the “area of lack” was).

Then she does it.

She completely crosses the line.

She COMPLETELY crosses the FRIGGING LINE.

She touches my BOOBS.

She touches MY boobs.

SHE touches my boobs.

SHE TOUCHES MY BOOBS!!!!

I was SOOOOOOOOO mad. I mean so mad that it was lava like. So mad that until the bride reads this, she will have absolutely no idea how mad I was. I mean, y’all if we had been in the street and this little girl had tried some mess like that……………………………………………………………………………
Sorry, I needed all those dots to come back to a place where I could write again. I was ticked. So as she’s sitting there, cupping my chest, I’m trying to think of how to get this chick off me without ME going to jail. So I put my hands over hers, put them together in a praying position and as gently as I could muster, pushed them back to her. I said, “No baby, we don’t do that. You don’t touch those.” Her response? “Oh, I was just trying to see where the fabric cut off.” As she’s smiling and laughing. Not in an “I’m sorry & I’m embarrassed because I realized I just overstepped & could lose my job or get written up” way, but like it was funny because she thought I was old fashioned and that I should have been cool with her cupping my girls!

Ok, my rant is back on. WHO THE H### TOLD YOU IT WAS OK IN ANY PROFESSION TO TOUCH ANYONE’S BREASTS (OR ANY OTHER BIKINI AREA) WITHOUT PERMISSION??? I MEAN, EVEN MY OBGYN ASKS BEFORE SHE EVEN LEANS TO TOUCH A DUR-GONE THING! AND I PAY HER TO TOUCH ALL THAT STUFF!!!

No, y’all. There are no words. And I mean this when I say it. The ONLY reason she didn’t get told off was because it was all about the bride. I will still contact the manager at a later date. I need to let the lava cool to a crisp so I can even speak about it to a manager there without all this emotion. For those who think it’s no big deal, ok. You can let whoever touch your boobs and think it’s not a big deal. If that’s the life you’re about, cool. My body, my boobs and no, it’s not cool to reach out and touch someone without their consent. Shooooot. You could lose your pulse messing around like that.

So, how does this story end? I interacted with her as little as possible. I tried to give her another chance to handle the dress picking, but once again, there she went, zipping me down past the top of my undies (maybe she was curious if they matched the bra??) even after she’d seen me do all my zipping and unzipping (except where she gave me a dress with a jammed zipper-had I known I would have unjammed it so she wouldn’t need to zip me down to my drawers).

I’d had it. I pulled the seamstress to the side and asked her if she could help me find a dress that could accommodate “all this”. She got it right on the first try. Didn’t take 5 minutes for her to walk me to the area, find my size in an available color and walk back to the fitting room. That’s how long it took. And guess what??? SHE NEVER TOUCHED MY BOOBS! Even when she told me I’d have to get the straps shortened, she adjusted the BACK of the dress and never touched me once.

Maybe I’m over reacting. But I have been assisted countless times and have only had foolishness like this occur when I was buying my own wedding dress almost 20 years ago. It was even worse than this situation, though. Two perverted old ladies called themselves “adjusting” me while I was getting into the top of my gown. Um, I’ve been handling this since the day they arrived.  I got this, thanks!  Even they got told off. I wasn’t so sweet in my 20s.

Anyway, maybe I shouldn’t get so offended. When you carry around these two magnificent, hypnotic, delightful accessories, I guess you should be prepared for some crazy folk to want to “handle the merchandise”. But they are not for sale and DEFINITELY NOT for handling.  There’s only one deemed worthy to handle all this, and it took him giving me his last name for him to get to hold these cups without asking!  So don’t mess up.  You will draw back a nub. You have been warned…

Until next time, this is “My Cup Runneth Over” signing out!

Sex, Cussing & a Bag of Weed

Before you think I’ve lost it for real, let me tell you.  My friend and I had a day straight from a Harold & Kumar movie!  All that was missing was the sex, cussing & a bag of weed!  Think I’m lying?  Let me take you on the journey with us…

My friend Tiff had to go to the hospital for a followup visit one city over so I decided I’d tag along.  We’re just riding along, joking and laughing.  We get into the city & the car starts tripping!  Lights on her GPS panel start blinking.  Ok, no big deal.  A few minutes later, the GPS panel goes completely dark.  She calls her hubby and he says no big deal.  So we trek on.  Less than another mile down the road, the dash lights start to blink.  Then the levels start going all over the place.  We both are concerned, but no big deal.  Then the dash lights go out COMPLETELY.  So here we are, no GPS, no speedometer, gas light, etc.  Stuff just got real.  But, just when she was about to start wigging out I said, “It’s ok.  The brake and the gas work, right?”  She tests them.  Yep.  Ok, no big deal!  We’re close enough that we can actually see our exit on the highway.  Oh wait, I didn’t mention we were on the highway, did I?  Yes, chirren.  We were on a major highway in some considerable traffic.  But we keep cool and decide to go to Auto Zone directly after we are done at the hospital.

So now the real fun begins.

The car completely dies.

Yup.  All I hear her say is “Uh, oh.  That’s it.  It’s gone.”  Now on the outside, I guess I was calm.  On the inside, I was freaking the freak out.  My inner monologue started something like this:

“Uh oh?  UH OH?  GIRL, WHAT YOU MEAN, UH OH?!  OH (BAD WORD) NO!  NOT ON THE SIDE OF THIS CRAZY (BAD WORD) HIGHWAY!!!  UM, DO YOU NOT SEE THAT 50 FOOT DROP ON MY SIDE OF THE CAR?”  (There was a concrete waist high wall there, but that didn’t matter at that point-I was in the losing-my-ever-loving-mind mode).

Y’all, that car shimmied and then started toward that wall and I just started bugging!!!  I was in Jesus’ FACE like, “DUDE, FIX THIS NOW!  NUH-UH, BRUH.  I LOVE YOU, BUT I’M NOT TRYING TO SEE YOU TODAY!  NOT LIKE THIS!!!”

Ok, inner monologue over.  The car comes to a jerky stop and I exhale.  Side note:  my friend is NOT a bad driver.  Never has been.  The car just up and died.  Gave up the ghost.  Quit like a disgruntled postal worker.  And where did it decide to die on us?  Like a quarter mile from the dad burn exit we needed to take.  You could SEE the exit sign and the ENTIRE ramp, y’all.  Oh, to make it better, we were directly across from the hospital we were going to.  Just about one or two hundred feet in the air and about a thousand feet away from where we needed to be.  Perfect.

Ok, that was interesting, right?  Yeah.  I thought you’d feel that way.  Well, it ain’t over.  No baby, this is the dust blowing around on the tip of the iceberg.  We are sitting there and then she’s like, what do we do now?  I was like “Huh!?” (on the inside-I told y’all I am calm on the outside and doing a serious Donald Duck fit on the inside).  So we sit there for a moment and ya’ll I ain’t lying.  I can LITERALLY hear the Jeopardy theme music playing in my head!  Jesus spoke:  Call & text your husbands.  (Oh Lord.  DUH!  We are after all only about 25 minutes from home.)

I text mine & let him know what’s going on.  He was so sweet that I was almost suspicious (he must have been watching First Take to see what was up with Skip Bayless leaving the show).   But let me tell you how I almost jumped through the phone and killed his little butt.  Have you ever been trying to use the phone and people keep texting/group texting/calling/emailing you all at the same time?  It’s not fun.  His little butt kept texting me and knocking me out of the screen I was in!  And make it so bad, he thought he was cute!  He made it on my hit list after that little stunt.  Along with the 6 people who had me strung up in group text blasts ALL DAY LONG.  Anyone know how to get out of those things?

Anyway, her husband suggests we 1. get an Uber, 2. keep the doctor’s appointment, 3. call AAA to get the car & take us to the mechanic in our home town & we go from there.  So we try it.  Little did I know, she’s going to the website on her phone.  It’s not working out & it’s been 5 minutes.  Um…we are still on this freaking bridge!!!  I decide to get the app.  I promise, y’all, I would have been calmer if an 18 wheeler wouldn’t have come by & shook us so bad I thought we were being raptured.  Y’all pray for my nerves.

Side note: let me tell you some real stuff about my family.  WE DON’T DOWNLOAD APPS UNLESS WE’RE ON WIFI.  NO.  JOKE.  My husband would have said to walk to the hospital.  My oldest son probably would have agreed or said to let her do that mess on her phone & that we ain’t ’bout that life.  However, since I felt my mortal life was at stake, I took the plunge.

Back to the story.  Y’all, why did it take longer to download the app and put in the payment info than it did for the Uber man to get there!  That man got there in less than 4 minutes.  NO JOKE!  And that car.  Y’all, the brother rolled up right behind us in a brand new cute as a button black Honda Civic.  He made sure we were ok (I had to call him and explain that we were on the side of the road on the highway & not at the Hardee’s 50 ft below the ramp like the GPS tried to say), whisked us away, got us to the hospital and dropped us off to safety in no time flat.  He was courteous, professional and best of all SYMPATHETIC!  I mean the service was FABULOUS!!!!!  That man got a $10 tip on a $4 ride across the street!.  I was so glad I was safe that I would’ve given him my left shoe if he would’ve asked.

But we were not safe yet.  Nope.  Not by a long shot.  And you know what else?  You’re going to have to wait until my next installment tomorrow to find out the rest of this foolishness.  Why?  It’s late!  LOL!!!  Now don’t be mad, just be back tomorrow for part 2!  I promise it’ll be worth it.  Love ya!

Tonya